I just didn't want to die in my sleep

I was just following the directions.

Next thing I know, I hear the wailing sound of a fire truck just before three firefighters wielding axes are beating on my apartment door.

And I was perfectly fine. And absolutely nothing was wrong. How embarassing.

Let's start from the beginning.

I was innocentely chilling out on my couch around 8:30 p.m. when I heard four piercing beeps. Chloe immediately jumped up to go hide in the bathroom (wuss) while it took me a minute to realize the blips were coming from the smoke detector.

Since my apartment is the size of a walk-in closet, I quickly looked around the room and observed that there was, in fact, no fire.

But it wouldn't stop beeping, and I couldn't get the battery out, so I twisted it off the ceiling and saw that it is actually a carbon monoxide and smoke alarm combo.

So between the beeps, which were so loud that I'm sure I was waking someone up in Finland, I read the directions on the back. They said the noise I was hearing - four quick, intermittent beeps, meant the alarm detected carbon monoxide.

Then I saw the WARNING! which states: "Carbon monoxide cannot be seen or smelled but can kill you." Oh shit, I thought. That must be why I've had a pounding headache all day and felt like a slug - I've been inhailing carbon monoxide!

So I read further under the warning. It said:
"If alarm signal sounds:
1) Operate the test / silence button."

Easy enough. But it wouldn't quit going off, so, naturally, I thought that meant my apartment was so saturated with the invisible poison that it was only a matter of time before I dropped dead.

So I read on:
2) Call your emergency services (fire department or 911)
3) Immediately move to fresh air - outdoors or by an open door/window

Number 2 seemed rather extreme, so after I got the building superintendent's voice mail, I opened the windows to let in the frigid air and called the emergency gas number I found in the phone book to ask them what I should do.

The woman who answered might as well been an answering machine because she didn't answer any of my questions and didn't offer any advice. All she asked for was my address, then said she was connecting me to the fire department.

OK, that's fine. They're the ones with the expertise, I thought. So I once again explained the situation to the fire department dispatcher, and before she hung up on me almost immediately, she said she was dispatching the fire department.

About five minutes later, I was dwarfed by three firefighters in full firefighting gear who came inside my apartment to check the carbon monoxide level - which was at ZERO. Seriously.

But they were nice enough to take the time to explain why the alarm may have gone off and what to do next time, which is reset it by taking the battery out and putting in a fresh one. If it continues to go off, DON'T open the windows, but call them immediately so they can see where the leak is.

About 30 minutes later, a representative from the gas company showed up to do additional tests, and found the levels to be much less than the maximum allowed. And while he was there, he made sure there was no gas leak.

So while I was extremely embarassed, I have to admit that I felt better knowing that I wasn't being poisoned and would most likely wake up the next morning - as long as Brent doesn't read this posting 'cause he'd totally kill me for being irrationally safe.

But better to be safe than sorry, right? RIGHT?